Friday 26 February 2016

Managing Expectation part 8

As we had discussed some of the insights and problems in managing the expectation of others, both in professional and personal life, now we discuss the solutions, approach to manage the expectation as it is difficult to fulfill the expectation always. 

Solution approach to manage the expectation:

1. Taking responsibility  to improve the competency
2. Improving  communication skill / feedback, giving and receiving 
3. Deciding  the choice and accepting consequences

Improving communication skill / feedback, giving and receiving:

      In professional life, we are struggling to meet the expectation of others or others are not up to our expectation is probably due to our inability to express our requirement very clearly… Expressing our requirements clearly is the art of communication and developing this skill is a life long effort as we need to deal with different people, with different situation and we are at different level of maturity.

      One technique we can use in a professional environment is PURPOSEFUL COMMUNICATION. when we ask for any details from team, we can go one step further by explaining why we need the data, when exactly we need, how this data would be useful .By explaining this in detail, we respect others as individual  and there is likely  less chance for  misunderstanding the expectation.

      Also developing the skill of giving the right feedback at the right time to others when things are not going as per our expectation helps to correct the situation as well as to improve the relationship. Similarly, we can develop the EGO free attitude for asking feedback from others when we are not clear on the communication or expectation of others.

Thursday 18 February 2016

Managing Expectation part 7

As we had discussed some of the insights and problems in managing the expectation of others  both in professional and personal life, now we discuss the solutions approach to manage the expectation as it is  difficult to fulfill the expectation always. 

Solution approach to manage the expectation:

1. Taking responsibility  to improve the competency
2. Improving the communication and feedback
3. Deciding  the choice and accepting consequence

Taking responsibility to  improve  the  competency:

       One of the reasons we struggle to fulfill the expectation of others in professional life  is the lack of required competency which organization or others  expect  from us. The one of the ways to cope up with the expectation is  to continuously  upgrade the competency. Competency is the combination of knowledge, skill and attitude towards the task. 

       Depending upon your profession, there is a need to continually update the core knowledge or technical skill. Apart from core skill development, other  management skills like able to prioritize the activities, able to extract the essence of the  information, able to get things down from others,  leveraging technology and others for personal productivity  and so on  needs to be developed.

       As per recent research by World economic forum, Problem solving skill is being top skill expected in the organization. Most of the misunderstandings between peers, boss and subordinate  arises due to lack of  understanding the big picture, detailing to data, analyzing the data, connecting the dots, interpreting the information, articulating the pro’s and con’s of actions  and ability to communicate the solutions approach etc .

      Development and mastering  above competency  is  a life long experience. As said earlier, managing the expectation is also a life long experience!.Hence invest yourself in improving your competency.

Monday 15 February 2016

Managing Expectation part 6

      Past weeks, we discussed  three  insights on  expectation. First, when there is a relationship, there must be an expectation. Second, in  a relationship, since someone is believing that you are the person  capable of meeting their needs, thereby expectation rises. If we want to preserve the relationship,  it  becomes our responsibility to manage the expectation. . Third, we cannot control other’s expectation and it is difficult to fulfill other expectation all the time, only we need to learn to manage or balance the expectation.

We will discuss  fourth insights  of expectation 

Insight 4:

"In a relationship, the expectation is not explicitly expressed"

      Most of the time, as we take relationship as GRANTED, we restrict the expression of our expectation to others. When we are not  explicitly expressing our expectation, it creates misunderstanding, disappointments and frustration in a relationship.

For example,

       as a manager, you  want to cut down the expenses and  expect your  team member to prepare the expense analysis. Your  team member is also preparing and presenting you all the data with analysis. But still internally you may be disappointed with your team ‘s performance. The reason could be internally you are expecting decision points  or solutions approach where you are getting only the accumulated data and analysis. You  might have assumed or taken granted, you team member understood your internal expectation and when the reality is not so, you are getting disappointed.

      Similarly, in personal life, your spouse / children want you to spend time with them and they may ask for taking them to short outings. Even after you spend your time and money on the picnic or outing, they may get upset with you. The reason could be the real expectation n is spending quality time with you and  you had not fulfilled during outings. Since it is an intimate relationship, things are taken  granted and the expression is not explicitly expressed.
The point to understand is in a relationship, most of the time, things are taken granted and the expectation is not expressed clearly. Once we understand these insights, we can discuss the solutions approach in the coming weeks..

Saturday 6 February 2016

Managing Expectation part 5

Past weeks, we discussed  two insights on  expectation.First, when there is a relationship, there must be an expectation. Second, in  a relationship, since someone is believing that you are the person  capable of meeting their needs, thereby expectation rises. If we want to preserve the relationship, it  becomes our responsibility to manage the expectation. This  reflection will relieve the stress  to some extend on managing the expectation.

We will discuss  third insights  of expectation 

Insight 3:

"You cannot control other’s expectation"

Even though our intention must be to fulfill the expectation of others to the maximum extent possible, we must also realize the fact that we cannot control other’s expectation of us. That means, others can expect anything from us, it is not possible always to fulfill  the  expectation. It  requires a balanced approach to managing the expectation and relationship.

This insight is important, failing which only, sometimes, we want to please all people and in this process, either we lose  our   temperament or personality  or disappoint  everyone surrounding us. 

For example, through your business, you are providing service  and your customer is  expecting more from you and sometimes expecting unreasonably say superior performance, lowest cost, and fastest delivery. You cannot control the customer’s expectation. At the same time, you may not able to fulfill all expectation, as you know it is a tradeoff between cost, speed, and delivery. 

Here what you must learn is how to manage the unreasonable expectation and retain the relationship, not on trying to please others at the cost of your profitability and peace .

We discuss the solution part once we outline one more insights on expectation next week !.

Wednesday 27 January 2016

Managing Expectation -Part 4

Managing Expectation part 4

     Last week, we discussed that when there is a relationship, there must be an expectation. Alternatively expectation arises  only there is some form of relationship. Now we understand why someone is expecting from us or we are expecting something from our relationship?

Insight 2:

Why someone is expecting from us? Because others are believing that you are capable of fulfilling their expectations.

For example, 

you are expecting more from you, because subconsciously you believe that you have more potential.

In a  professional environment, your boss is expecting more from you than other  colleagues, because he believes you have more potential and  capability to deliver.

In family life, family members are expecting more of your time  with them,because  they believe that  you are the source of love, source of care, source of affection.
Your friend  is  sharing  his problems with  you, because he is  believing that you can provide perspective or solutions to the problem.
In a nutshell, someone who is having a relationship with us, believing that we  can fulfill their expectations.

If you understand this fact, Is it not previlege for  you  for having such a relationship in your life ????..If this is previege  or a gift you got in your life, is not your responsibility to make an effort to fulfill the expectation of the relationship ??

If you internalize this insight, you will never be feel stressed  on managing the expectation..You thank God for having so  many people in your life believes that you can deliver, then managing expectation becomes easier… Reflect on it till next week!!!

Saturday 23 January 2016

Managing Expectation -Part 3

      As discussed last week, as most of us struggling to manage the expectation and in this process, we get into disappointment, frustration, personal vengeance or stress.

       We discuss this aspect into insights and solutions approach. Before getting into solution approach, let us understand some of the truth or  insights about the expectation management.

Insight 1:

        In personal life, expectation arises between you and yourself, expectation arises between you and your parents / brothers, expectation arises between husband and wife, expectation arises between parents and child, expectation arises between teacher and students and so on.

        In a professional environment, expectation arises between you and your boss, expectation arises between you  and your team, expectation arises between peers and so on.

        In a business environment, expectation arises between supplier and customer, expectation between client and service provider, expectation arises between business and society and so on.

        Likewise, expectation arises between one element and another. In all the above examples, what does exist in common? In all the examples, there exists "RELATIONSHIP". Expectation arises only when there is a RELATIONSHIP. Alternatively, we can say when there is a relationship; there must be expectation in the relationship. .

        Generally, we are not expecting much about someone who does not have much relationship with us. We expect something only someone is associated with our life through some relationships. Hence, when there is a relationship, there must be some expectation. If we internalize this fact or insight, this would  bring a new dimension to solve the managing the expectation problem.

        The next insight would be when there is a relationship, why someone  is expecting from us .Let us discuss the insight next week

Wednesday 13 January 2016

Managing Expectation -part 2

         As outlined last week, in personal and professional life, most of us are struggling to manage the expectation as we have limited time and  resources.


When there is a gap between the expectation and reality, it becomes problematic. This  problem may result in disappointment, angry, self deprivation, frustration  or  in modern management terminology  STRESS.
For example, at a personal level, you may  like to give up some bad habits  and in reality, if you are not able to give up, that makes  you disappointment, that shakes your self confidence or you start to hate yourself. How to manage about yourself  during such circumstances?

Similarly, in professional front, you may  expect  high performance levels  from your team and the team is not up to your expectation, you get into disappointment, frustration or personal level vengeance   with some team members. Eventually it starts spoiling  the quality of  relationship with the team. How to manage the expectation from others? In the reverse situation, your boss is expecting more from you and if you are up to his expectation, the same level of stress your boss may be undergoing  as you are going through!!!..How to manage the expectation of others for you??

Similarly, even in family front, you may expect  something  from your spouse, children and the reality may be  different. You get into disappointment and sometimes the disappointments turn into  anguish  and   verbal battle situations. How to manage those expectations  in a domestic environment?

The point for realization is that there is no guarantee that reality will always be same as you are expecting. What we need to learn is how to cope or manage the gap  between the expectation and reality.


We discuss some of the insights about expectation  management next week!