Past weeks, we discussed three insights on expectation. First, when there is a relationship, there must be an expectation. Second, in a relationship, since someone is believing that you are the person capable of meeting their needs, thereby expectation rises. If we want to preserve the relationship, it becomes our responsibility to manage the expectation. . Third, we cannot control other’s expectation and it is difficult to fulfill other expectation all the time, only we need to learn to manage or balance the expectation.
We will discuss fourth insights of expectation
Insight 4:
"In a relationship, the expectation is not explicitly expressed"
Most of the time, as we take relationship as GRANTED, we restrict the expression of our expectation to others. When we are not explicitly expressing our expectation, it creates misunderstanding, disappointments and frustration in a relationship.
For example,
as a manager, you want to cut down the expenses and expect your team member to prepare the expense analysis. Your team member is also preparing and presenting you all the data with analysis. But still internally you may be disappointed with your team ‘s performance. The reason could be internally you are expecting decision points or solutions approach where you are getting only the accumulated data and analysis. You might have assumed or taken granted, you team member understood your internal expectation and when the reality is not so, you are getting disappointed.
Similarly, in personal life, your spouse / children want you to spend time with them and they may ask for taking them to short outings. Even after you spend your time and money on the picnic or outing, they may get upset with you. The reason could be the real expectation n is spending quality time with you and you had not fulfilled during outings. Since it is an intimate relationship, things are taken granted and the expression is not explicitly expressed.
The point to understand is in a relationship, most of the time, things are taken granted and the expectation is not expressed clearly. Once we understand these insights, we can discuss the solutions approach in the coming weeks..
We will discuss fourth insights of expectation
Insight 4:
"In a relationship, the expectation is not explicitly expressed"
Most of the time, as we take relationship as GRANTED, we restrict the expression of our expectation to others. When we are not explicitly expressing our expectation, it creates misunderstanding, disappointments and frustration in a relationship.
For example,
as a manager, you want to cut down the expenses and expect your team member to prepare the expense analysis. Your team member is also preparing and presenting you all the data with analysis. But still internally you may be disappointed with your team ‘s performance. The reason could be internally you are expecting decision points or solutions approach where you are getting only the accumulated data and analysis. You might have assumed or taken granted, you team member understood your internal expectation and when the reality is not so, you are getting disappointed.
Similarly, in personal life, your spouse / children want you to spend time with them and they may ask for taking them to short outings. Even after you spend your time and money on the picnic or outing, they may get upset with you. The reason could be the real expectation n is spending quality time with you and you had not fulfilled during outings. Since it is an intimate relationship, things are taken granted and the expression is not explicitly expressed.
The point to understand is in a relationship, most of the time, things are taken granted and the expectation is not expressed clearly. Once we understand these insights, we can discuss the solutions approach in the coming weeks..
No comments:
Post a Comment